We had supper with the youngest spawn tonight out on the deck. Somehow, the following conversation occurred:
Me (to Ted): You know, your chest hair grows in the shape of a T. Like for Super Ted.
Spawn: We noticed that too. He says it’s for Terrific.
Me: Really now? Maybe we should shape it up with the clippers.
Ted: We could shape into a naked lady with an anchor.
Me: I thought more like shape it up to better define the T.
Ted: I thought naked lady.
Me: I don’t think I can be that creative with the clippers.
Ted: The Spawn here is pretty artistic.
Me (to Spawn): Do you want to shave Ted’s chest?
Spawn: Thanks. I’ve lost my appetite, and wish I had lost my hearing.
Me: I take that as a no?
Spawn: May I be excused?
Ted: I have hair on my butt too.
This is why we rarely sit down to a family meal.
And if it is possible to slam a sliding glass door, the youngest Spawn did. The eldest spawn is probably grateful to be hiking out West right about now.
I swear when I was driving home tonight, I promised myself this would be about the garden.